i woke up and decided not to go to work and instead i went shopping for freeze dried animal fetuses in toronto.
driving along spadina i was rear ended by a taxi, who actually tried to swerve around me and take off.. after a quick thought about the extra insurance i had paid on the rental car i was driving i decided to make today more exciting than most days...
so i persued him down a side street until i managed to block him in behind a parked car and my own... feeling extremely angry by that point i decided he deserved to be severely beaten.
I emerged from my car armed with a tire iron and a roll of quarters in my fist. surveying the amount of damage he had done to my car i estimated the cost of repair and decided to do just slightly less damage to him.
i smashed out his back windshield at which point he got out of his car. I quickly hit him across the forearms with the tire iron and punched him square in the face with my roll-of-quarters-fist... which in turn caused his nose to break and bleed profusely. With that i felt satisfied and returned to my vehicle to continue with my day.
It was around lunchtime so i parked and got a crepe from that place across from much music. and of course as i always do, i strolled up to grange park and ate my crepe there. With my belly full, i passed out under a tree. when i awoke my wallet and shoes were gone.
and that kinda sucked.
i figured that was enough excitement for the day and i'd have to leave my freeze-dried fetus shopping for another day. i returned to my fucked up rental car and drove home.
To make myself feel better, i stopped by a friends house where a party was in full swing. somebody had brought a whole bunch of ecstasy caps and i grabbed a few.. just cuz.. how often do you get free E?
well one thing led to another and soon there were a few couples just fucking in the living room, in plain view. I grabbed my friends video camera and decided to make a quick video of this blossoming drug fuelled orgy.
after 30 mins i ran out of tape and returned to my home cuz i was fucking tired. i uploaded the video to the internet despite the fact that it actually included a few of my friends and i didnt ask for permission. thats just cuz im a fucking prick and i dont give a shit about anyone.
so after a nights sleep i woke up and went to work, where instead of working i wrote this completely bullshit long journal entry about events that never really took place outside of my head, which you just read.
it was kinda fun to read tho wasnt it?